The Ultimate Guide On Self Care for the Working Mom

If there is ever a time in history when self care is at maximum importance, it’s now. The research is in and working moms have been hit the hardest with the coronavirus stay at home orders and school closures. We’re expected to keep working normal hours in the office, home school our kids, and manage the household, all under challenging circumstances of a pandemic. 

While we all know self care is important, and need it desperately, it’s hard to stick to a self care plan that constantly refreshes and rejuvenates us. Keep scrolling for a strategy that will help you not only stick to self care, but make it a priority that rejuvenates your life and work.

How to Make a Self Care Strategy (And Stick With It)

In order to make a self care strategy a normal part of your routine, try following these steps:  

Determine how you recharge. Not everyone enjoys the same self care activities. While some working moms may enjoy a spa day, other moms may want to get her hands dirty and work in the garden or take a pottery class. Don’t force yourself to do “self care” that isn’t right for. Think about the activities you love and how you feel afterwards. If the activity makes you happy, rejuvenates your body, and clears your mind - then it’s probably a great self care activity for you!

Schedule time in your calendar for you. All working moms are busy, busy, busy. But we seem to make time for things when it’s in our calendar. Use your organization and commitment to your calendar work for your self care routine as well. Set a time on your phone or computer for whatever self care activity you choose and don’t cancel. You can also set up multiple pre-meeting alerts to remind yourself. I’ve even gone as far as setting reminders in my phone itself that share a message from me, like, “Hey! It’s almost self care time. Wrap up what you are doing and don’t miss it!”

Set one or two self care goals. Setting a goal and getting formal with self care might make it seem too...business-like. But just like in business, setting a goal will help you reach it! Here are a couple of examples of self care goals:

• In the next month, I will schedule one self care activity a week.

• I will set aside 15 minutes a day to turn off all technology, find a quiet spot, and read a fun book.

Get an accountability buddy. When you want to reach your goals, you tap a person you trust to hold you accountable. This proven tactic can work for self care success as well. The best accountability buddy is someone who has a similar self goal so that you can monitor each other’s progress and encourage one another empathetically. 

Observe how self care affects your life and work. After you’ve decided what you will try as your self care activities, set goals, scheduled the activities in your calendar, and found an accountability buddy, it’s time to pay attention. What you think will work may not. What you don’t think will work, may be the key you’ve been looking for. After your self care activities, take note on how you feel. Maybe you need to try a different activity, or you may just need to make tweaks to your schedule. For example, 15 minute quiet time first thing in the morning may not be feasible if you have young kids, so doing it over your lunch break may work better. 

17 Self Care Ideas for the Working Mom

Here are 17 self care activities for the working mom to help you brainstorm and explore options that may work for you as you:

1. Indulge in a Spa day (you can do this at home!)

2. Practice self meditation (Kristin Neff has some great exercises!)

3. Take part in a clearing exercise (like this one from Maria Tucker)

4. Exercise

5. Go for a hike

6. Watch a movie that you choose

7. Indulge in your favorite food or dessert

8. Take a nap

9. Go to bed early

10. Take an art class

11. Write in a journal

12. Spend 15 minutes a day meditating

13. Write a gratitude list

14. Write letters to friends and family

15. Take up a new hobby (for example: scrapbooking, leather making, or photography)

16. Redecorate your work space or bedroom

17.  Buy a new outfit, makeup, or accessory that makes you feel beautiful

Many of these steps above can be taken with a friend so I would encourage you to enlist a friend in your self care if that feels good to you. Self care done with someone you connect with positively is twice the fun!

What else would you add to the list? Parents Pivot is always looking for new ways to support working moms in their transition back to paid work. If you’d like 1:1 support and resources, contact Anna at Parents Pivot today!

Simple Tricks To Fit Reading Into Your Busy Schedule, Plus A Working Mom Reading List

It’s become common knowledge that the most successful people in the world have impressive reading habits. It’s also known that if you want to raise a reader, be a reader. Putting together your own working mom reading list seems like a good move, both for you and for your kids. 

But how on earth does a working mom juggling all the hats fit in time to read? 

5 Simple Tricks to Squeeze in More Reading

If you’re anything like me, having a reading list sometimes seems like something that people without kids have the luxury to indulge. But, after lots of practice to make it a priority, I’ve found ways to fit in reading without sacrificing other responsibilities. Here are five simple tricks that will work for even the busiest of moms.

Bookend your day. Start and end your day by reading for 15 minutes. When you first wake up, read 15 minutes in bed. Then when you lay down for the night, read 15 more minutes before you go to sleep.  You’d be amazed how much progress you can make in 30 minutes a day.

Read on your breaks. Use your scheduled breaks to work your way through your to-read list.

Use your phone. Fill your Kindle app with books so you always have reading material on hand. Whenever you have a few minutes of downtime -- waiting for a meeting to start, sitting in the school pickup line, or even standing in line at the grocery store -- pull out your phone and read a few pages.

Diversify. Reading more than one book at a time can actually help you read more, overall. You can choose the book that best fits your mood, making you much more likely to pick it up and read. 

Read with your ears. Honestly, this is my favorite one. There are often more opportunities during the day to listen than to read, so consume more books by listening to them on audio. Listen while exercising, during your commute to and from work, or while catching up on housework. Turn up the speed to “read” even faster!

The Working Mom Reading List

So now that you have time to read during the week, here are a few recommendations to start your working mom reading list:

1. Tara Mohr’s book Playing Big is one of my favorite books for women interested in taking on new challenges. 

“While not all women aspire to end up in the corner office, every woman aspires to something. Playing Big fills a major gap among women’s career books; it isn’t just for corporate women. The book offers tools to help every woman play bigger—whether she’s an executive, community volunteer, artist, or stay-at-home mom.”

2. Breaking the Gender Code: How women can use what they already have to get what they actually want by Danielle Dobson is one of my personal favorites.

“Breaking the Gender Code encourages you to realise your contribution is highly valuable in all your roles, and the skills and capabilities strengthened by being a parent and caring for others is a powerful adaptive leadership and career asset. You don't need more of anything. By using what you already have, you are able to get what you actually want.”  

3. I am currently reading So You Want to Talk About Race by Ijeoma Oluo. This book is stretching my understanding and awareness of systemic racial issues. I highly recommend it for everyone.

“In So You Want to Talk About Race, Ijeoma Oluo guides readers of all races through subjects ranging from intersectionality and affirmative action to "model minorities" in an attempt to make the seemingly impossible possible: honest conversations about race and racism, and how they infect almost every aspect of American life.” 

4. Stretched Too Thin: How Working Moms Can Lose the Guilt, Work Smarter, and Thrive by Jessica Turner is currently on my nightstand and is a practical book with wisdom and worksheets! Every chapter concludes with a challenge to make it practical. 

“Working mothers constantly battle the pull to do all the things well. From managing work and home responsibilities to being impacted by a lack of self-care and time for deep friendships, the struggle is real. At the end of each day, many working moms are exhausted and stretched too thin. But this does not have to be the norm.”

5. I Know How She Does It: How Successful Women Make The Most of Their Time by Laura Vanderkam is backed by science and the perfect read for moms looking to make real change towards success. 

“Instead of relying on scattered stories, I Know How She Does It adds hard data to the debate. Based on hour-by-hour time logs from 1001 days in the lives of working mothers earning at least $100,000 a year, this book shows how these women spend the 168 hours that every one of us has each week. Case studies and interviews document how women make time to advance in their careers, enjoy family activities, and pursue their own passions. Based on these strategies, I Know How She Does It offers a framework for anyone who wants to thrive at work and life.”

6. Design Your Day: Be More Productive, Set Better Goals, and Live Life On Purpose 

 by Claire Diaz-Ortiz is inspiring, motivating, and challenging. You’ll love it!

“Whether you want to finish a house project, lose weight, or write a book, Design Your Day—by someone who read 150 books while caring for an infant—is an all-in-one guide to smart productivity. Use Claire’s tricks and tools and you’ll be amazed at what you can do in a day, let alone a lifetime.”

What books would you recommend adding to the list? I’d love to hear your recommendations. Tag Parents Pivot on Instagram with your favorites!